January 2012
74 posts
Seriously
What is it that I’m not getting about Kristen Wiig?
December 2011
61 posts
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The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.
– Ernest Hemingway (via hypefreelife)
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Merry Christmas!
(You wonderful old building and loan!)
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Wasn’t he a bad guy? Like a serial killer or something?
– My mom when I asked her if she knew who Salvador Dali was.
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Me: We could see The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.
Mom: O, that's Japanese.
Me: No, it's not.
Mom: Are you sure?
Me: It's an American movie, based on a Swedish book.
Mom: O, is it Chinese?
Me: No. Why do you think it's Asian?
Mom: Cause of dragons.
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I have syrup in my mustache.
Judd Hirsch > Emile Hirsch
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Is hoboing a word? Cause if so I saw two guys old...
As in they were walking by the train tracks carrying those sticks with little sacks on the end.
icarntspell asked: I blew Dave Grohl.
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I just took off my hat and a peanut fell out.
It’s happening. I don’t know what it is, but it’s happening.
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Hey, has anyone else noticed that Jon Hamm's chest...
No? Just me? OK.
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Grumpy Domestic Chewbacca
It’s quite possible that I’ve been working on this all day.
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Not that I condone fascism, or any -ism for that matter. -Ism’s in my...
– Ferris Bueller
I relate to every part of this.
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Dear Ohio,
If you want to stop raining for like ten fucking minutes, nobody’s going to be pissed.
Sincerly,
Mr. Kick Ass (aka Mr. Rubber Burner)
I realized today that I only do imitations of...
I’ve been working on my Rowlf the Dog, but it kills my throat and I don’t know if I’m ready to tell people I lost my voice because I spent the whole day talking like a Muppet.
I smell like pizza and garbage.
Somebody hug me.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?
In Norse Code
What do you call a Scottish cloakroom attendant?
Angus McCoatup
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